“Hey, would you like to meet for a coffee some time? I’d love to hear more about how you work and what you do.”

It’s a really simple ask, and one that most people will gladly agree to. Like many, I love any opportunity to talk about myself and my work in a casual setting - and I’ve accepted this request many times in the past, to my own delight and satisfaction.

And I admire how much courage it takes to ask the question.

If you consider yourself to be an introvert, I have a few tips for you to keep in mind as you navigate the world of networking through Informational Interviews!

How to ask

My first advice is to recognise that you are paying this person a huge compliment by requesting any of their time. By giving them this compliment they are already in a frame of mind to accept. Allow this to give you confidence that you are not imposing a burden on the other person - in fact you’re giving them something to be happy about!

My next advice is to ask someone you already know a little bit. If you’re at a networking event and you’re talking to someone already, and you feel like you have some rapport, then it’s a great time to ask the question! If that’s too much pressure, then make sure to grab some contact details and ask them within a day or two of the event. Exchange business cards with the promise to follow up! If you’ve already made a good impression, they’re much more likely to accept.

I’d advise against trawling LinkedIn for random people to reach out to and asking them cold. I’ve read blog posts from other coaches promising a “100% Effective Formula For Leveraging LinkedIn Networks To Generate Career Success Using Proven AI Method” and you know, that’s not how I operate. Being in front of someone in person, being open and being honest is scary, but the only effective path forward.

How they might respond

If you consider yourself to be an introvert reading this, then part of your hesitation to network might be rooted in uncertainty over how the other person might respond. Let’s take a look at a few possible outcomes.

So you’ve just asked the question: would you like to meet for a coffee?

If they seem flustered, surprised, or shy then that is perfectly natural - this invitation might be new for them too! Asking for Informational Interviews is becoming more common across all industries, but it’s fair to assume this might be their first time as well. If they seem unsure, you can reassure them “I’ve enjoyed our conversation and I’d love to to find out more about what it’s like working at xyz” or “I”m trying to to become a (job title) and if I could find out more about how you do your work, I would be so grateful”.

They might accept! Congrats! Make sure you get some contact info to organise a place and time and remember follow up within a couple of days.

They might say no: the introvert’s worst nightmare! If they say no, that’s completely up to them and there’s nothing you can do other than to respond politely “not a problem, it was nice meeting you - hope to see you around!”.

Saying no doesn’t mean “I hate you, how dare you offer to take me for a coffee, why would you even think you are worth a moment of my time” It just means “I can’t do that right now”. This could be for any number of reasons:

• The person is really busy
• The person works for accompany with a strict policy about talking about their business
• The person manages clients and wants to protect their lunch breaks for themselves
• The person is leaving their company soon and hasn’t told anyone

Don’t read anything into it. Don’t ask ‘why’. Just thank the person and be polite.

At the Interview

You’ve probably read about Informational interviews before, but in case you’re new to them, a quick review of the basics. They are not:

• A Job interview
• A chance to ask for a job
• A chance to talk about yourself

They are an opportunity for you to find out more about a new industry, or a company that you might want to work for one day. They’re an opportunity to make a new connection with someone who might be able to help in your job search or career progression - but with no promises or guarantees.

Organise a time and place that is convenient for the other person: possibly a coffee shop close to their workplace on their lunch hour. At the location, you should offer to pay - but don’t force the matter if they decline.

What to ask

If you get nervous around interviews then remember: they are the focus of the conversation, so let them do most of the talking! Prepare a list of questions, but try to keep the conversation flowing naturally. Here are some simple questions to give you ideas:

• How’s your day going?
• How did you get your job at xyz? What was the application process like?
• What does your day-to-day work look like?
• If you’re able to share, what’s your favourite project you’ve worked on?
• Where do you want to go in your career?
• What’s particularly challenging for you right now?

That final question is my favourite - if you’re applying for work at their company then it tells you what question you need to answer at their job interview: what problem they need to solve. And even if you’re just looking to get some insights, this question opens up a lot of real talk about the shape of the industry and can get you a ton of useful information.

Afterwards

Say thank you, follow up with a polite thank you message online and keep in touch with that person if you can. Something like “Thanks again for your time today, I hope we can keep in touch”.

Congratulations on completing your Informational Interview! I hope it’s a step that opens new opportunities for you.